Menopause or some other carnal evolution could be a factor. An aversion to your own desires could be the result of sexual abuse, or of an injury. Later, perhaps, your personality might get in the way: For example, maybe you’re too damn intellectual and uptight (that once described yours truly, I’m sorry to say). What gets in the way of knowing your own desires? Youth, for one thing: It takes time and experience to get to know yourself.